I totally agree that it's not a race, but we're not meant to stand still either, for whatever definition that is for you. For me, I try to make it a hike. There are easy, strenuous, and very difficult hikes. You wouldn't summit Half Dome with a baby, but you might think about it when they're 12. Or not, and you take nature walks along streams and wildflowers. If you stop for a break, you're in the middle of nature.
If you want to climb mountains, go for it. But remember that every peak reveals another in the distance. Enjoy the view.
I had a section about maybe a hike being a more apt metaphor!! Glad to hear you are thinking the same. Some people may hike half some, some may observe an ant hill. Some may do both at different times.
This resonates 1000%. The biggest difficulty for me is actually getting myself to behave as if it’s not a race, because leaning into the race comes so naturally.
We're taught to lean into the race. The faster you go, the more you produce, the happier you'll be. Never mind that crashes at 120MPH are much more dangerous than those at 50.
That’s certainly the “nurtured” side of the race, I would argue that there’s a “nature” side as well in which we’re predisposed to comparison as a survival instinct.
Wherever it comes from, it takes effort to willfully exit the race.
Thank you for this thoughtful reflection. As a senior product manager, I often feel the pressure to keep up with others' career trajectories, but your reminder about focusing on what truly matters resonates deeply. It’s easy to get caught up in titles and achievements, yet the regrets of the dying remind us that life is about more than career milestones. Your piece inspires me to align my priorities with personal fulfillment, not just professional success. Great read!
"It’s easy to imagine that if only you made X amount of money, or worked at Y company, you would be happy. Money can certainly alleviate a lot of problems, but there are plenty of people who work at Y making X (or much much more than X) dollars a year who are miserable."
Is it true? I hear that a lot lately, however I struggle to find stories about these people (who make X at Y and still are miserable). Isn't it just some "let it go and love yourself" stuff, that isn't true? (I do not try to imply you're lying. I'm just asking if you'd be so kind and share some stories about these people)
"It’s easy to imagine that if only you made X amount of money, or worked at Y company, you would be happy. Money can certainly alleviate a lot of problems, but there are plenty of people who work at Y making X (or much much more than X) dollars a year who are miserable."
Is it true? I hear that a lot lately, however I struggle to find stories about these people (who make X at Y and still are miserable). Isn't it just some "let it go and love yourself" stuff, that isn't true? (I do not try to imply you're lying. I'm just asking if you'd be so kind and share some stories about these people)
This is so timely. I recently realized that I had been unconsciously playing a comparison game with my work and it was ratcheting up my stress. Once I remembered that I was playing my own game, had my own path, my stress eased and my creativity returned in full force, probably not surprising.
Thanks for sharing this, Alina’s a wise one, Her words will echo for a long time.
Thank you for this reminder.
We all need it! ❤️
I totally agree that it's not a race, but we're not meant to stand still either, for whatever definition that is for you. For me, I try to make it a hike. There are easy, strenuous, and very difficult hikes. You wouldn't summit Half Dome with a baby, but you might think about it when they're 12. Or not, and you take nature walks along streams and wildflowers. If you stop for a break, you're in the middle of nature.
If you want to climb mountains, go for it. But remember that every peak reveals another in the distance. Enjoy the view.
I had a section about maybe a hike being a more apt metaphor!! Glad to hear you are thinking the same. Some people may hike half some, some may observe an ant hill. Some may do both at different times.
This resonates 1000%. The biggest difficulty for me is actually getting myself to behave as if it’s not a race, because leaning into the race comes so naturally.
We're taught to lean into the race. The faster you go, the more you produce, the happier you'll be. Never mind that crashes at 120MPH are much more dangerous than those at 50.
That’s certainly the “nurtured” side of the race, I would argue that there’s a “nature” side as well in which we’re predisposed to comparison as a survival instinct.
Wherever it comes from, it takes effort to willfully exit the race.
Thank you for this thoughtful reflection. As a senior product manager, I often feel the pressure to keep up with others' career trajectories, but your reminder about focusing on what truly matters resonates deeply. It’s easy to get caught up in titles and achievements, yet the regrets of the dying remind us that life is about more than career milestones. Your piece inspires me to align my priorities with personal fulfillment, not just professional success. Great read!
Profound article. Very much happy that I stumbled across this email which drawn me here for reading all the articles from Jean.
Thanks a lot. Looking forward for many more enlightening writings from you.
"It’s easy to imagine that if only you made X amount of money, or worked at Y company, you would be happy. Money can certainly alleviate a lot of problems, but there are plenty of people who work at Y making X (or much much more than X) dollars a year who are miserable."
Is it true? I hear that a lot lately, however I struggle to find stories about these people (who make X at Y and still are miserable). Isn't it just some "let it go and love yourself" stuff, that isn't true? (I do not try to imply you're lying. I'm just asking if you'd be so kind and share some stories about these people)
"It’s easy to imagine that if only you made X amount of money, or worked at Y company, you would be happy. Money can certainly alleviate a lot of problems, but there are plenty of people who work at Y making X (or much much more than X) dollars a year who are miserable."
Is it true? I hear that a lot lately, however I struggle to find stories about these people (who make X at Y and still are miserable). Isn't it just some "let it go and love yourself" stuff, that isn't true? (I do not try to imply you're lying. I'm just asking if you'd be so kind and share some stories about these people)
This is so timely. I recently realized that I had been unconsciously playing a comparison game with my work and it was ratcheting up my stress. Once I remembered that I was playing my own game, had my own path, my stress eased and my creativity returned in full force, probably not surprising.
Thanks for sharing this, Alina’s a wise one, Her words will echo for a long time.
(their words)
So glad it was timely! and that your creativity has returned in full force!